How to Handle Holiday Food Pressure

Posted December 02, 2024 by Hilary Hassinger, PhD

“Have some! A few bites won’t hurt. But I made this because I know you like it.”

It’s likely we’ve all dealt with comments like this at some point. Instead of providing support, it seems like well-meaning loved ones are trying to derail your healthy eating plan. Intentional or not, the pressure to eat can make you feel uncomfortable, or worse, leave you feeling disappointed in yourself after you’ve gone off-course.

It's Okay to Say No

There are many valid reasons to turn down food, including medical conditions, personal beliefs, dietary goals, or simply not feeling hungry. Whatever the reason, finding ways to politely decline will help you feel comfortable and confident sticking to the eating habits you have chosen.  

Try these tips when dealing with food pushers:

• Use a simple “no thank you.” A clear and confident refusal is often the most effective approach. No explanation is necessary. Avoid any hesitation by deciding ahead of time whether you are going to accept a food item or not.
• Be honest. If you feel comfortable, share your health or dietary goals. Try saying, "Thank you, but I'm on a special diet," or simply, "Thank you, but I'm trying to focus on healthy eating."
• Consistency is key. The more you practice setting your boundaries, the easier it will become for those around you to understand and respect your decisions.
• Offer a compromise. If a food pusher persists, suggest taking the food to-go. This way, you are not saying no, you are saying “I will enjoy this so much more tomorrow when I am not full”.
• Turn sabotage into support. Saying no to loved ones can be especially hard. That's when it's important to seek support from the would-be saboteurs. Be honest about what you're going through and your goals and ask them for their understanding and help.
• Bring your own food to share. When it’s appropriate, bring food to share. This ensures there will be food at the gathering that is delicious and fits into your plan.
• Start with a compliment. Often, food pushing is related to seeking reinforcement or validation on all the hard work someone has put into making the dish.  Acknowledge the effort put into the dish while politely declining: "That looks delicious, but I'm full."
• Use stall tactics. If someone asks, or demands, that you try a dish, tell them you look forward to trying it later. Chances are, this person is not going to follow you around waiting for you to try their dish.
• Change the subject. If someone is making comments about your food choices, change the subject to shift the focus away from food.

A small indulgence won't derail your overall progress. But make sure you are making the decision to indulge independently of the pressures from others. Stay focused on your long-term health goals, and don't let peer pressure discourage you.

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